Monday, September 8, 2014

Honoro Vera Garnacha 12'

Naked Wine Review 151

Wine: Honoro Vera Garnacha
Producer: Bodegas Ateca
Vintage: 12'
Region: Spain>Calatayud
Price: 9.00
Date tasted: 9/7/14
Place tasted: Saturated in full moon madness I was sitting in a bar with Ganesha drinking garnasha and eating ganache. All I could think was 'oh shit, if one side doesn't get me, the other one will'. Guilt, sex, wine, chocolate cake, yoga, Metatron, Ganesha, the faeries, pineapple express, obsessive self discipline... where does this recipe end, and what kind of image does it bake up to be? I mean, can you even comprehend a chocolate covered organic magic carrot salad? Well, maybe YOU can.
Then Ganesha said to me, "Image is nothing more than an obstacle that blocks truth". That's all he said... well that and that he was going to go bathe in the river tomorrow.  
Good talk.
Served with: Nanaimo Bars... and why not? It's a great combo, trust me.
It would also go well with grilled meats, venison, lamb roast, herby pasta or vegetable dishes and strong cheeses. 
Appearance: Sparkling clear ruby red with a violet aura.
On the snoot: A strong sweet bouquet of wild flowers, cherry cotton candy, and pine cones.
Taste: Sweet dark cherry lovingly stroked by mulling spices and fresh cracked pepper give a welcoming naked embrace while a deeper consciousness of her beauty blossoms in a incandescent glow of fresh rain and oak until you are so full with delicious wine flavor you could just burst. Then she brings the experience in for a landing on a lingering mellow fruit runway brushed with dusty tannins and cocoa. 
Now go ahead and blush, enjoy the afterglow, and repeat the experience.
Balance: She paints her color, thick and pretty all over the insides of your glass while allowing the weight of her long luscious legs to run slowly through it. Her subtle sugars, nice acid content, high yet smooth alcohol level, and fine feather dusty tannins complete a perfectly balanced and beautiful wine. 
Comments: She's a mouthful of pure splendor. I plan on keeping this one around for a while. I may even put a bottle in my Teotwawki bug out bag. 


Rating: 4 staggering tipsy's

Monday, August 25, 2014

Thorny Rose Chardonnay 11'

Naked Wine Review  150

Wine: Thorny Rose Chardonnay
Producer: Thorny Rose Wines
Vintage: 11'
Region: Washington>Columbia Valley>Prosser
Price: 9.00
Date tasted: 7/27/14
Place tastedIt was a hot summers day and waves of sunshine were bouncing off a high mountain lake making it sparkle like glitter. All... ok well some of the good people in Tuffit Town were gathering up their crawdads to train for the big race later. I wandered in quiet observation like a contented ghost with no attachments but to the nature of being, and to the nature of nature. What a perfect place to taste the wine!
Served with: Apricot marinated grilled chicken breast, baked potato and a side salad... Nice! Would be great with summer salads, fresh fish, fruit and soft delicate cheeses. 
Appearance: Ethereal happy faeries dancing on golden liquid sunshine.
On the snoot: Honeysuckle and pear embrace to create a gentle and enchanting perfume. 
Taste: Crisp and fruity on impact with citrus notes of clear high soprano. Green apple and pear combine with salted caramel and ride out like Lady Godiva on a clean naked finish bathed in splashes of cool minerals.
Balance: A beautiful balance of spring meadows, rocky waterfalls, and fresh orchard fruits. If you like a crisp chardonnay, then you'll surely appreciate this light and refreshing wine. 
Comments: Good hot weather summer wine. Another pretty girl from Washington State. 

Rating: 3.7 tipsys



Saturday, July 26, 2014

Coronas Tempranillo Red 09'

Naked Wine Review 149

Wine: Coronas Tempranillo Red Wine
Grapes: Tempranillo, Cabernet Sauvignon 
Producer: Familia Torres
Vintage: 09’
Region: Spain>Catalunya 
Price: 11.00
Date tasted: 7/25/14
Place tasted: I was floating on my back in a hot springs enjoying the Earths most sensuous element with calm surrender. Suddenly a couple of wispy clouds moved in a shameless dance of copulation across the periwinkle sky above me. I rose up to the edge where gentle breezes stroked and cooled, and the taste of an endearing red wine satisfied the whole of my senses. A deep breath blew into me and I received it like a warm embrace, feeling richly blessed and grateful. 
Served with: Pear and Gorgonzola filled mini phyllo tarts. These are so good and so easy to make, you have to give my little recipe a try. Delicious. 
Appearance: A deep glowing liquid gem of red garnet brilliance fills your glass and dazzles your vision. 
On the snoot: Plump fruit hanging fat on the tree; breezing with the scent of a lake side orchard and wet willow branches.
Taste: Flavors of big cherry and ripe plum mingle with woody earth and cardamom pods. Dry and soft with cocoa dusted tannins that blend without overpowering. A long virile finish fills the mouth fully then lingers in a naked afterglow of unique and exotic expression. 
Balance: Perfect. Very slight on sugars; acid quite gentle and understated though nice and dry. Although the alcohol is 14% it's not too hot and does not need extensive breathing time. Tannins are soft, plentiful and polished. Shapley legs cascade down the glass in patterns of unique form.
Comments: Poetry in a glass. I love the touch of cabernet which hangs like priceless jewels on an already beautiful being of pure royalty. Need more. MORE! 


Rating: 4 tipsys, excellent value… omg, really really good.

Saturday, July 12, 2014

Triton Mencia 11'

Naked Wine Review 148

Wine: Triton
Grape: Mencia
Producer: Jorge Ordonez Group
Vintage: 11'
Region: Spain>Castilla y Leon>Vino de la Tierra de Castilla y Leon
Price: 16.00
Date tasted: 7/7/14
Place tasted:I was watching the ants moving around on concrete by my home where the 94 degree sunlight beat down on their freshly built domiciles. They seemed unaffected by the heat and in fact pretty happy about the whole thing. I guess that's where the expression 'happy as an ant' came from. Anyway, I couldn't help but wonder as I slowly chewed my wine from a nice shady vantage point, do ants sweat?
Served with: Mint Crusted Rack of Lamb (on smashed potatoes), which was easy to make and so good I thought I'd died and gone to heaven. It is an excellent choice with this wine. 
Appearance: Like the naked silhouette of a beautiful woman dancing freely and draped in violet silks, almost completely hidden in the inky black night.
On the snoot: The scent of a chiseled hot sweaty man picking the blackberries he found growing near an old abandoned railroad track...
in other words, berry, testosterone and creosote,  a heady, provocative cologne. 
Taste: Ripe black current warms in layers of licorice spice nutmeg and peppercorn softened by herby catnip. Finish darns a long flowing gown of tannin with the sticky patina of tobacco and soft oak. 
Balance: Robust body and long legs that show great enthusiasm as they go running down the sides of your lucky glass. Kind of hot out of the bottle so let her breathe for a couple of hours after opening so the flavors can warm and blossom. Tempered acids, almost no residual sugar, and a plethora of warm fuzzy tannins make for a firm, balanced structure. 
Comments: She's full of character with many layers of flavor that compliment one another beautifully. My first impression was 'wow, this reminds me of Pinotage', which is one of my favorite wines. With all that tar and the dirty trolls feet, it was love at first taste. 


Rating: 4 euphoric tipsys

Friday, June 27, 2014

Petite Petit 11'

Naked Wine Review 147

Wine: Petite Petit
Grapes: 85% Petite Sirah, 15% Petit Verdot
Producer: Michael David Winery
Vintage: 11'
Region: California>Lodi Appellation 
Price:13.00
Date tasted: 6/25/14
Place tasted: I'm not sure, it was really dark there and it smelled like burnt toast. I was being held captive... again. I was very pleased when they finally brought me this bottle of wine to drink. Approaching like ghosts they came, hollow, darning hooded black capes. They had pointy metal spikes that sprouted from lumpy green brows, and a pungent black perspiration oozed like crude oil from their pours (I could swear I saw Bill Gates among them). Anyway, as I sipped my wine and planned a miraculous escape from the belly of the great beast I wondered quietly to myself... 'Where in the hell is the cavalry?'... Well?
Served with: Roasted Carrots & Shallots with Oil-Cured Olives & Gremolata. It's a robust spicy wine so go ahead and pair it with robust spicy foods, herby pasta/vegetable dishes, grilled red meats, lamb, venison, strong hearty cheeses, dark chocolate delights and things of that nature.
Appearance: Inky black purple with an opaque onyx glow.
On the snoot: Blueberry & leather combine in a powerful punch to the snoot. Nice. 
Taste: Big! A meaty and stunning Xena Warrior Princess. Bold black fruit and peppercorn ride on floods of soft polished tannins. Old leather, cocoa, and earthy undertones fill out the complexity of her character and linger through a long delightfully dry finish. 
Balance: She sports the body of a naked Amazon with slow bulbous legs flowing in waves, one after the other. Comes out of the bottle pretty hot but softens nicely as she breathes. Well balanced sugars and acids, with masses of soft cushy tannins.
Comments: You may taste vanilla and not cocoa as my palate seems to consistently confuse the two. Still, I taste cocoa, so I say cocoa. The winemaker says vanilla. Either way, it's a very tasty bold and exciting wine drinking experience well worth having. I quite enjoyed it. If you like a bold red with lots of tannin, you'll quite enjoy it as well.


Rating: 3.7 tipsy's

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Ciconia Vinho Regional Alentejano 11'

Naked Wine Review 146

Wine: Ciconia 
Grapes: Aragonez 60%, Syrah 30%,Touriga Nacional 10%
Producer: Casa Agricola Alexandre Relvas
Vintage: 11'
Region: Portugal>Vinho Regional Alentejano
Price: 9.00
Date tasted: 6/12/14
Place tasted: I was inside a glass jar with holes in the lid so I could breathe wondering why they put me in here? At least they gave me a stick to climb on. At one point a large reptile eyed creature gazed in at me through the wavy glass. His eyes looked like sterling pie plates with crimped edges, lashless and cold. Pinched between those large fingers was a bottle of wine. I scurried into the corner as he lifted the jar, unscrewed the lid and gently placed the bottle along with a wine glass into my tiny controlled environment. He then placed my jar on a window sill so I could see the world outside. As I sat on my stick drinking that wine I swore to the love of all who are free that I would find my way out...  and one day, I will. 
Served with: This is a very food friendly wine and would be good with herby red pasta dishes, grilled meats, lamb, spicy vegetable creations, and a variety of cheeses. It was perfect with Caldo Verde (Portuguese Green Soup) 
Appearance: A clear radiant ruby with purple edges in the light. 
On the snoot: Like strolling through a fruited bramble patch with the scent of vanilla and soft wood riding on a gentle breeze.
Taste: A bowl of fresh blackberries and full round jammy flavors with soft vanilla and oak blended in. Polished linear tannins and a sound structure give support to follow through a medium length bold juicy finish. 
Balance: Medium body with minimal sugar, soft acids, well integrated tannins and a good punch of alcohol. Let breathe just a little before drinking.
Comments: The blend of Tempranillo (Aragonez) with Syrah and the unique bit of Touriga Nacional is just perfect. A good wine to have around for any occasion or no occasion at all. It's a feel good wine and I plan on consuming more of it in the near future.
A toast to the joyous celebration of Festa de sao Joao do Porto and to Portugal in general. 
Wine, not unlike music, is a wonderful way to appreciate the finer points of many cultures, lands, and people. To world peace, cultivated in wine and song. 
Saude!


Rating: 3.8 tipsys, excellent value


Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Terre Di Plinio Sangiovese 11'

Naked Wine Review 145

Wine: Umbria IGP Red Wine
Grape: Sangiovese
Producer: Donini
Vintage: 11'
Region: Italy>Umbertide
Price: 10.00
Date tasted: 5/26/14
Place tasted: I was riding a white ostrich through the valley of the shadow of death, laughing at the fireflies and howling with the voles. We took rest and drank from the glistening stream of hope, and in the dim moon light I sipped wine and visualized Ballard. How could I not?
Served with: Foods with lots of acid and zip to them. Pasta with tomato sauces; grilled meats and roasts; or antipasto and hors d'oeuvres, such as baked artichoke dip, baked cheese olives, and easy tasty layered dip.
Appearance: She's scantily clad in a veil of clear vibrant garnet with rusty orange edges.
On the snoot: Heavy with ripe cherries, vanilla bean, star anise and creosote.
Taste: Delightful blend of cassis, cocoa, pipe tobacco and tar with a dash of salt. Light and dry yet complex and powerful with tons of cute fuzzy little tannins that purr as they are stroked through a long finish of masterfully muddled scents, flavors, and textures. 
Balance: Light and dry with gentle acids, no residual sugars, lively alcohol, and a plethora of scrumptious tannin. 
She sports a beautiful body with chorus line of deliberate, organized and symmetrical naked legs. 
Comments: Thank you once again to the experts at Wordens Wine Market in Missoula Montana for helping me chose yet another winner. If you can find this in your neighborhood for god sakes buy some. It's seriously good and wonderfully food friendly.    

NOTE: If it walks like a chianti and quacks like a chianti, it's probably sangiovese.
       

Rating: 4 tipsys, excellent value

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Estancia Chardonnay 12'

Naked Wine Review 144

Wine: Estancia Chardonnay 
Producer: Estancia Winery
Vintage:  12'
Region: California>Central Coast>Monterey County
Price: 12.00 
Date tasted: 5/7/14
Place tasted: I was in a lush green meadow enjoying the company of a new friend who wore the most charming golden earring. Refreshments of ripe strawberries, Camembert, and a chilled bottle of delightful chardonnay rested at blankets edge while the late afternoon sun warmed our naked little toes. As afternoon turned to evening a brand new happy place was born and the taste of kisses, sweat and wine still flavor the edges of my memory. 
Served with: Camembert and strawberries. Would go well with cream sauces, chicken, seafood, soft cheeses and more subtle and delicate flavors, such as mushroom & pine nut risotto.
Appearance: Like a glass full of gentle moonlight with a glowing honeydew shine.
On the snoot: Ripe tropical papaya, with a breeze of honeysuckle and rain drizzled in caramel. 
Taste: A tropical fruit bowl that catches your attention while intertwining with kiwi and melon. She has an enchanting creamy smooth nature and fruity finish that comforts the palate in a sincere lingering afterglow. 
Balance: Muted acids and brightened sugars practically give her angel wings; very well balanced and supple bodied. Mountain ridges form and then slowly melt down the sides of your glass like a moving landscape. 
Comments: A sexy well crafted wine. Marilyn meets Jayne meets Deneuve...you get the idea. I would chose this chardonnay for any white wine occasion, but especially when romance is on the menu. 
Ah spring! I wish you all happiness and love.
Cin Cin.


Rating: 4 solid tipsy's

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Brujeria Red Blend 08'

Naked Wine Review 143

Wine: Red blend
Grapes: 50% Tempranillo, 20% Shiraz, 14% Grenache, 8% Cabernet Sauvignon
Producer: Some Young Punks for the Misfit Wine Company
Vintage: 08'
Region: Australia>South Eastern Australia 
Price: 10.00
Date tasted: 4/28/14
Place tasted: A black dog had chased me up a tree and I wasn't even wearing any shoes. I did however have a bottle of wine, cork screw, and an emergency glass in my wine2k bug out bag so I was prepared to wait it out till that black dog decided to give up and go bug someone else. The late afternoon sun warmed me and my naked feet and while sipping wine I let all my troubles tumble down the trunk of that tree where the dog gobbled them up like food. About half way through my glass I found myself smiling and humming a pretty tune. The next time I looked down I saw the dog walking away in defeat. 
May the black dog of misery never catch your scent. 
Cheers all.
Served with: Braised lamb shanks with balsamic vinegar... yummy! It would be good with many foods including grilled red meats, game, stews, roasts, lamb, medium to strong cheeses and of course, dark chocolate. 
Appearance: A sparkling alexandrite red with opalescent flashes of purple and orange. She's a looker, very pretty.
On the snoot: Enchanting perfume of sweet ripe plum and cherry with just a hint of fresh gummy fish.
Taste: Wow, what an incredible blend of grapes! It's like tasting a wine rainbow. Plenty of juicy gentle fruit laced with spice, leather, and smoke. Soft polished and understated tannins make one swoon and grin. Finish is smooth and wet. 
Balance: With a 14% alcohol you'd expect it to be kind of hot, but it's not, just delicious. She's as balanced and poised as a circus performer on a high wire. 
No bitterness, rich but not sweet, a tasteful amount of tannins, not too hot or too cold.... this wine is just right. 
Comments: I love it. I love everything about it. I'm going to make it a regular in my wine stash. You just can't not like this wine. 


Rating: 4 staggering tipsy's, excellent value

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Antano Crianza 09'
Red Blend

Naked Wine Review 142

Wine: Antano Crianza 
Grapes: 85% Tempranillo, 10% Graciano, 5% Mazuelo 
Producer: Garcia Carrion
Vintage: 09'
Region: Spain>Rioja
Price: 8.00
Date tasted: 4/14/14
Place tasted: I had spent the afternoon choosing a tree to plant in honor of the upcoming Earth Day Celebration (April 22nd). I'd decided on Chokecherry in hopes of one day harvesting fruit from which to make wine. Thoughts of spring and flowers, mountain hikes and meadows, and Saturday morning farmers markets made the edges of my lips curl up in in joyous expression. 
As the evening blossomed in layers of changing mood from earth to sky where a round yellow moon was hung in incandescence, my attention turned to the wine in my glass as a painting all its own and I marveled at the gift of my various senses. Being human is not without its perks. 
I wish us all the joy in divine truth and awareness today and always. 
Served with: Herby red sauced Italian dishes, grilled red meats, roasted vegetables (like red bell peppers), and of course rich dark chocolate things like flourless chocolate cake with ripe red strawberries. Just make sure there's something red in there and you'll be fine.
Appearance: A mysterious inky black garment with light rusty edges covers her curvy naked body.
On the snoot: The scent of black fruit and vintage rose petals on a sandy ocean beach caress the air around her.
Taste: Cassis, fig, and soft vanilla with mineral rain are wet on the palate; then woody tannins fill the mouth and gobble up all the fruit, leading into a long satisfying dry finish. A happy ending with a little spank. 
Balance: She sports a modest medium body with shy meaty legs. No residual sugar; she's bright with a bite but warms nicely after relaxing and breathing for a while. A plethora of tannins full of character and charm complete her well balanced character.
Comments: Spanish is among my favorite of wines. This one's a lively and food friendly delight. Pick some up and enjoy a festive and inspired day.
Salud! 


Rating: 4 tipsys, excellent value

Sunday, March 30, 2014

milbrandt vineyards
Brothers' Blend 11'





Naked Wine Review 141

Wine: Brothers' Blend (Red)
Grapes: tempranillo, grenache, malbec, cabernet, and petit syrah
Producer: Milbrandt Vineyards Winery
Vintage: 11'
Region: Washington>Columbia Valley
Price: 13.00 
Date tasted: 3/7/14
Place tasted: I woke the morning after a night of working as a waitress in a cocktail bar, in 1984. I was so relieved that all these years had just been a strange dream and I really had not screwed anything up yet. 
With my lifes journey just beginning and 'knowing what I know now', I pondered all the many new and wonderful mistakes I would get to make this time around; at least they would not be the same ones I made last time, that much I promised myself. 
As twilight approached I was inspired to savour a bottle of rare wine from the future with some cozy simple comfort food. Then later as I listened to my Talking Heads records I felt the strangest sense of hope. I love that feeling.
Ah life, here we go again.
Cheers all!
Served with: Fantastic lamb meatloaf. She's an exceptionally food friendly wine. An antipasto spread would be nice, or grilled red meats, roasts and stews, herby pasta dishes, hearty vegetable creations, a nice fruit and cheese spread, or just a nice chunk of good dark chocolate.
Appearance: A deep haunting pond of clear beautiful pomegranate.
On the snoot: Her scent brings on visions of lake side cherry blossoms, and plump ripe blueberries dusted with cocoa. 
Taste: Robust flavors of dark cherry and chocolate carmel splash around the mouth. A hint of oak on velutinous tannins gently caress the pleasant melange of flavors through a pronounced, wet, fruity finish.
Balance: Remarkably balanced, dry yet wet with soft naked tannins and gentle alcohol. Lovely legs darning sexy maroon stockings melt down the sides of your lucky glass.
Comments: This is such a tasty unusual blend; another amazing wine creation from Washington State. If you want to purchase it there though you can go ahead and add another ten bucks to the price for taxes... I kid you not. The former Washington State Liquor Stores do not look like such a bad thing now, do they? Voters chose, what can I say? It worked out well for Costco. 

Rating: 3.9 tipsys, excellent value (in most states)





Saturday, March 1, 2014

Kings Ridge Oregon Pinot Noir 12'

Naked Wine Review 140

Wine: Kings Ridge Oregon Pinot Noir
Producer: Union Wine Company
Vintage: 12’
Region: Oregon>Willamette Valley
Price: 15.00
Date tasted: 2/22/14
Place tastedI was dancing on a flame, or was I in the flame? Maybe I was the flame; hot, inspired, and all too volatile. Would I devour forests, feeding on wind and earth, or would I be quickly snuffed by those same elements? Fate, however, did not seem to be my concern. 
Prance the prance… dance the dance… spin and burn… twist and turn. There is no truth in naked shame; no guilt nor pride, no one to blame. 
As I burned away through the snowy night I thought of you. How the hell are you anyway? 
Here's to our eternal connection, and to being in touch with our inner Dr. Seuss. 
Skal!
Served with: Cornish game hens in apricot sauce. She’d go well with the lighter flavors of poultry, seafood, and mildly prepared beef. Soft cheeses, creamy sauces, and mellow herbs and vegetables are nice as well.
Appearance: Fills your glass with the color of clear polished rubies and violets. Very easy on the eyes.
On the snoot: Heavy with rich red fruit and roses. 
Taste: Dry delicate and gentle cherry spirits dance around the palate in naked joy on a bed of rose petals and cocoa. Soft polished tannins make a brief impression but quickly blend into the background echoing in a lasting juicy brushed velvet finish. It’s a beautiful thing.
Balance: Slow lava lamp legs hypnotize and encourage a calm reflective mood. Light weight with a perfect blend of soft acids, lively alcohol, just a tiny sprinkle of sugar and minimal muted tannins.
Comments: She has the most lovely enchanting perfume. She’s also well dressed, graceful and tastes of happiness and bliss. You can’t not like this wine. Once again, Oregon does Pinot proud.

Rating: 4 tipsys, excellent value